I look back in my life and I realise that I have let everyone go that wanted to leave, or who I wanted to leave from. I have had no problem breaking up from boyfriends, the end of romantic flings, leaving my home town, moving away from friends, completing high school, departing employers, losing touch from people I meet on my travels or having housemates move out. It’s as if there is a part of me that doesn’t exist? As if my brain fails to provide a chemical that emits a compulsive need for someone? I feel like this is possibly the most awful thing I’ve ever realised.

I don’t get sad often at all but today I was sad a bit because I had a lot of time to think and I realised that I have a tendency to not need anyone and I really don’t want that to happen this time round because I adore my boyfriend and I hope he continues to be patient with me and my self diagnosed inability to give anyone 100% of everything I comprise of complex.